-- GAY AND KATHLYN HENDRICKS,
From as early as being 4 years old i have been emotionally suppressed. Both parents have been religious but whilst they had been drumming the fear of god into my innocent brain they weren't so innocent of ''practicing Catholics'' themselves. Yeah they went to church but dad liked to sniff coke and gamble and mum being very young and from a dysfunctional broken family herself was more interested in going out and being the interest of whatever hot guy was around at the time.
But apart from religion i grew up with a unrealistic look on society don't get me wrong i have some very good memories but their not necessarily that great, their just memories Ive made more attractive to my adult mind than they actually were.
I can remember exactly the day my life went from being jaded and esthetically pleasing , it was 14/2/2000 exactly a week after my grandad died . And that was it - that's when i started to become emotionally detached . Gone were the days of being the spoilt grand daughter with a cheeky attitude and a unrealistic view on every human around me.
A few years later when i became a young adult was when i became the chief babysitter for my sisters, cleaner, lack of encouragement with no routine to my life whatsoever.
So what im saying is, has emotional suppression and lack of life skills set me up for failure?
They say you make all your mistakes with your first child - is that the case was i the prototype because i was the first child?
Either way the older ive got the harder and more resentful i am about the lack of things required for the beginning of a child's life.
I never felt like i wasn't loved or cared for before the ages of 15 but now i feel angry and damn right robbed of a chance.
Luckily im not the sort that will turn to heroin or prostitution... THANK GOD, well not really.
I can remember exactly the day my life went from being jaded and esthetically pleasing , it was 14/2/2000 exactly a week after my grandad died . And that was it - that's when i started to become emotionally detached . Gone were the days of being the spoilt grand daughter with a cheeky attitude and a unrealistic view on every human around me.
A few years later when i became a young adult was when i became the chief babysitter for my sisters, cleaner, lack of encouragement with no routine to my life whatsoever.
So what im saying is, has emotional suppression and lack of life skills set me up for failure?
They say you make all your mistakes with your first child - is that the case was i the prototype because i was the first child?
Either way the older ive got the harder and more resentful i am about the lack of things required for the beginning of a child's life.
I never felt like i wasn't loved or cared for before the ages of 15 but now i feel angry and damn right robbed of a chance.
Luckily im not the sort that will turn to heroin or prostitution... THANK GOD, well not really.
